heart left, naive right

Im pretty sure im done-zo with premed
let me give u the pros and cons:


Pros

• I get to take classes like bio and learn about the human body.
• A new sense of intelligence, knowing I'm learning concepts, alot of people wont be able to understand.
• If I get accepted in medical school I will make my mom very happy.
• I get to help others in need.
• And after a while I get to make shitload of $$$$$
• .........

Cons

• Sleep deprivation, nahh this shit kicks in BEFORE med school.
• Science is harddd, likee reallly hard, especially at my college , we have a reputation for hard sciences :(
• Science is pretty boringggg,not sure if im even good at at.
• The people are wayy too comepetive for me, I understand competiton is in every career, but asking ppl for you for your grades before they even say hi, is just douchee.
• Too stressful, spent alot on my time crying, simply depressed. Is premed worth my happiness?
• I can be doing this shit and not even get in med school. Can be going through this shit JUST to get rejected.
• I have soo many passions in my life, art,theatre,photography,media,journalism, writning, fashion. Do I really wannna give that up for good.?
• Premed makes me bitter and mean to the people I love. I become a different person I dont like that girl I become when I do premed.
• If I get in med schoool , Im sure its gonna be boring besides the clinicals.
• Ima be in debt like $200,000 in debt
• Sure doctors make moneyyy but I would havee soo many loans I wont even get to enjoy it.
• Most of the money I do make is going to go into lawsuits from patients. Doctors get sued o.d.
• Ima have to fight for a residency, prob dont even get the one I want or be in the state I wanna be in. I wanna stay in New York.
• Sleep deprivation is evn worse but unlike in undergrad where I can sleep whenever I want. If im on call I cant just hit the snooze buttton.
• Family life pshh I wont have time for that shit.
• Also sometimes I think being a doctor is kinda boring. paperwork blahhh getting bitched by my attending.
• To be honest im not sure if I even like it

So as you can see the cons out weigh the pros. However I can't give up this idea of becoming a doctor.

why?

Because I know if I fully pursue any of the other careers my job/future wont be stable or a definite. Pre med Im sure I will have a job and make money to support myself, un like in art, or even journalism where most of the shit is freelanced. Sometimes I hate art because I love something that isnt stable if my passion was science or business everything would be great. I can be a CEO ,scientist ,doctor or whatever and I wouldnt mind doing it and going through the harsh classes because I love it, but I dont. People always say if you can see yourself doing anything else beside being a doctor, then dont be a doctor. Hmmm food for thought.

what I would do for peace of mind...