Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Pick and you shall recieve

Ok so I have alot of motley vids I wanna show you guys but, I dont wanna drown you guys in it (I will later though haha) but I do feel the need to write so Ima give you all a chance to pick a line from the following and from there I will write an elaborate short story on it ok? So these sentences are gonna be random not thought out at all so here we go.....

  1. "Dude be quiet we cant let them hear us,because if they do its going to be over."
  2. She sat there in the spotlight, her makeup smudged and blood oozing down her face."This is what they call life" she said.
  3. He never believed in stuff like that.For Paul religion was just a masquerade for the weak. Those who needed something to believe in for why their lives are so shitty, so they just say "It's in Gods hands."
  4. I imagine this is what falling in love would sound like.
  5. "Those are some lovely lines I wouldnt mind if I take somemyself" Lena said.



pick one of the above and I will write a mini story on it. Hopefully you wil enjoy it. Im no Plath or Woolfe nor will I ever try to be or do I wanna be anyway, but I thought this would be fun and something new to add to my bloggity blog.



Monday, December 21, 2009

whats really good?!?!?!


its been forevr since I been on this bitch, I've been hella busy with school and shiz but now im on winter vacation I can resume to blog :) Ive been getting alot of ppl telling me to blog again and I dont want an angry audience,no buena.
so my inner Cruehead has been growing alot lately, been jamming to them like everyday. Mick Mars in particular caught my cat eye. He is the quiet and weird guitar player(who is very underatted btw he should be up there with slash and hendrix no lie & I'm not the only Cruehead to say this) so to prove my point Ima show you how good my boy is :) This is his solo from Merry Go Round one of My fav Motley Crue songs :)))

ohh and he is also the hottest guy ever he is the 3rd one with the long hair and beer can my kinda guy :)) Unfortunatly he suffers from A.S. a degenerative bone disease the pic below is when he was younger .He can no longer move his neck from left to right ,it has left him stiff. But, he is still playing music and has been touring with Motley for Cruefest which I will save money and go to one of these fkn days.

ohh and watch this video fast foward to 2:00 u get to hear more guitar playing hear his voice which I find soothing for some reason and at the end he makes a wierd joke and has the most cutest laugh lol

damn I sound like a groupie
thank god I wasnt around it the 80's....

Wednesday, November 4, 2009


It's been awhile and if you're anything like me you are extremly busy with school,I mean how can you not be?
But before I emerse myself in Glycolysis and the Citric Acid Cycle I decided to come back to the bloggity world entertain you all.
So someone told me that they want me to do followup on my previous eentry "No Singles Allowed" which made me happy that someone is actually reading thisblog for one and second that someone foiunbd it captivating enough to want me to write more on that issus.Make it seem worthwhile that someone is connected to my words and understand what Im writing about.
Therefore I WILL be writting a followup on the "No Singles Allowed" post shortly. But, I have a major exam Tuesday a.ka. "Judgement Day".
Wish Me Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, October 17, 2009


In New York I feel that if you are single you are no longer valuable. I now know what Carrie Bradshaw felt like. Being in NYC I feel that if you are a single gal you are looked upon as if you just robbed a bank! But, I f you are premed, you dont havet time for dating.One of my best friends,Louisa told me that "If you are premed, yor never going to date and your gonna be a virgin forever,but its gonna be worth it when you make more money then your friends who were dating and hooking up with pppl will ever have,we put in the effort." While I find this to be very funny, it is also true.Unless you are premed you will never know the sacrifices we have to do, you will NEVER know unless you lived it,I can tell you but, unless you lived it you don't and will never know.

With that said I don't even know if I'm the dating type. I can't picture myself calling someone everyday or holding hands and being all affectionate.I cant really picture myself seriously caring for someone besides myself.Like what is the point of having a boyfriend?Sex?Friendship?Companion? You don't need a bf to have sex, there is Boldalways the random hookup or evn toys lmao ;) I don't need a bf be my friend because I have my girls and my gays as friends and for companionship there is always cats:) I HATE when people ask "So where's the boyriend?" "Hows the love life?" Is it REQUIRED to have a boyfriend past a certain age? Did I miss that memo?

Or perhaps my standards are too HIGH, but shouldn't yours too? I don't know why we settle.Because I never settle. its either what I want or its nothing, I'm not gonna settle for anything less. I don't know why we must sell ourselves short.

But, with this being said I still become jealous when I hear about my friends and their social lives and dating lives. But, as my dear friend Lolo once told me"If one of my friends were to get pregnant, I'm not so sure If I would still be jealous of them?"

Next post, Perhaps I will show you guys my list of standards,be ready to read for hours HAHA!

Saturday, October 10, 2009

I found a Jewel

So LOVE LOVE Jewel, Her music is so powerful I mean you have to listen to the lyrics and the meaning behind her songs.All of her songs I believe are actual life experiences. I highly recommend you all to listen to her first album 'Pieces of You'

If I can write songs and/or play guitar like she does I can say I accomplished a major goal in my life.

Anywho Ima post these two videos from her 'Pieces of You' album.Lets play a little game: Tell me what you think these songs are about otherwise their meanings and since Im a major Jewel fan I might know the meaning if not then go to google, but dont go to google until you make a guess on your own :) But living in a world Of Lady Gaga's we sometimes forget real song writing, thank God atleast we have Adele
This song is very powerful prepare to get some tissue because It might make you cry once you know what it is about:(

listen to the lyrics again ppl!!!! TITLE:MEMOIRS OF A HOUSEWIFE

Tuesday, September 29, 2009


So Im in love with this band slowly slipping their way up to my top 5!!(Another brooklyn based band I like whats up with that??) Anywho this song is from their news album Vecktamist which came out this summer and I devoured it as soon as it came out, but for all of you who are still listening to old g.bear you guys gotta deff check out the new albummm AMMMAAAAZINNGGGG!!!

Friday, September 18, 2009

old soul

Ok so I have came to the conclusion that besides the fact that there might actually be a gay boy inside of my straight girl body, there also might be an 50 year old in there too. I can remember back in middle school for my obsession with all things "ancient" or as the kids these days are calling it, vintage. In junior high I would wear my hair in this "monroe" inspired curly do and yes I worn red cherry lipstick. That made me look beyond my years. I would walk around the halls and say "How do yo do?" to my teachers in a low whisper just like the girls back then use to say it. As the years progressed I became a HUGE fan of Audrey Hepburn. It was a rainy day and I sat down on the couch and watched 'Roman Holiday' on AMC, which I believe is one of her first movies and she won an Academy Award as well if I'm not mistaken. I wanted to BE her.100% Audrey. Unlike the actresses I grew up seeing these girls had class, they worn heels and lipstick to throw out the trash.(HAHA that rhymes!!) And instead of tack tongue rings , they wouldnt be caught without their diamonds.

And this goes for music too. I grew up listening to the oldies:Marvin Gaye, Al Green, The Temptations,Aretha Franklin and the list goes on. My brother always blasted underground rap too, my family always liked the underground which influenced the person I am today in fashion,music my life style etc. I love all things old, things that can tell a story. In high school the 60's wave hit me harder then an Hippies acid trip. I feel in love with Edie Segwick, Any Warhol and the factory,Twiggy, Brigitte Bardot and all things MOD. During this time I would wear these short babydoll dresses to school with my black leggings, what a weird one I was...

Even today Im still an old soul my music tatse goes from the The Andrew Sisters to the Beatles and Neil Young to Motley Crue and Journey. Its all over. Even for rap I like old school rap from the 90's. Maybe my old soul is why Im despreate to find another cherry red lipstick. I guess somethings you can never get over...

This song,this band the lyrics it means alot to me, I feel the words

And this is for the lovely Audrey Hepburn...
(I encourage you all to watch the whole Audrey Video, they show some of her quotes that will make you adore her even more <3)

Sunday, September 13, 2009

to look at life microscopically

We only can see whats in front of us, but the real joy of the gift of sight is to see the little things. Because without the little things the "bigger" things in life lose their significance. I get to see the little things in life on a regular basis. Me, the microscope and the cells. The pictures above I took from a very difficult angle. I put my camera to the eye piece of my microscope and I tried to get the best shot I could. So YES these pics are straight from the scope. These are plant cells (I should've taken pics from the animal blood cells as well )
I won't be blogging as much as I use to, because those Harvard Med grades arent going to make themselves pop up on my transcript, but I will post any new pics/videos/thoughts/ideas/art or whatever pops into mind that I feel is significant enought to blog about.
So until then then...

Monday, September 7, 2009


its kinda like eating an Oreo cookie and finding out there isn't any creme...

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

blog commitment?

I feel like I havent been a "steady" blogger or as someone likes to state "what happened to my blogger commitment?

A few months ago around the start of my summer vacation me and my bestie went back to the good ol high school for this art alumni show. All the AP Art kids came back to show their art and what they are doing in their career art wise. And let me tell you they all look the same I really hoped someone showed up with a really bad nose job, ya know to keep the conversation flowing. As the night got older I realized how much I miss high school, but as soon as I felt that nostalgic feeling some annoyin 15 year old made me glad I did'nt have to deal with their squeaky prepubscent voices any more.

Me and Stephanie and some other high school friends sneaked into one of the old art rooms. We went to the 'loft' upstairs in the room which was a studio where all the AP kids kept their art and chilled.I had my camera and I captured. My hands desired to be dusty by charcoal again.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

where was I??

Bonjour! I been listening to wayy too much Beyonce lately besides that

I have no thoughts.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

No more 'Prep'

Sassy ladies from the left (Taylor aka "the public school one", Kelli! and Camille)
So NYC Prep ended last night. The season finale was everything I wanted and more. Jessie's Operation Smile event was a major success. Camille meet up with Jessie to discuss her future with Operation Smile. Jessie wasnt having it she totally dissed Camille telling her that "there is the Facebook group she should joined" umm HELLO DUH!! PC got his acceptance letter for Occidental College in LA. and what is even more shocking is that PC actually showed an ounce of humility when he apologized to fashion designer Carmen Marc Volvo, about bringing his "downtown vampire" entourage to his show, which could've put Jessie's internship with the designer in jeopardy. Even the pseudo player Sebastian decided to have his own charity event. It was about giving portable and clean drinking water to people in Africa, kudos Sebastian Kudos.However he went back to his wannabe player ways b y stating "its also good because girls like that kinda stuff" or somethinbg along those lines like that.At Sebastian's event he offered Kelli (oops i forgot its Kelli!) a chance to sing at the event since she is an aspiring singer, and surprisingly she does have a good voice, a little nasally at time , but hey she's only 17.
For what it wads NYC Prep will never be forgotten, Atleast for me anyway. It took the viewers to a place where you have to trade your eyeballs for diamonds to really see.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

picture perfect

All I ever wanted was a happy family.

For all of you who have that please cherish it. I get soo jealous when I see people and their relationships with their moms/dads. I just wonder "why me?" its cliche I know, but why I don't I have a relationship like most of my friends with their rents. It sucks not having any real family relationships besides my older brother. Nor is it fun to fill my life with material things to comfort me. Material objects is like a mother to me. So when I see shows like NYC Prep and these kids are not only beyond wealthy, but have parents who care for them, its just everything I dont have, so the show fills a void. They say money doesnt buy happiness, but if you dont have happiness you have money so thats not so bad. But if you dont have money and you dont have happiness, it leaves you with nothing.

It just sucks growing up and not having anyone or a logic thinking adult. So when I grew up i thought perhaps my mom will stop being selfish and do things for me instead for her benefit.Bc as a child me and my bro always was there for her so maybe she will do her parenting later on NO she didnt. Now at 20 years old she is still all for self.

This basically sums it all up::::

Fall 2008 I was having a hard time with my sciences classes and being the perfect premed student. So I told my mom " I dont know if I can do this anymore, its too hard, I dont know if I have what it takes to become a doctor." I looked at my mom waitng for the typical supportive pep talk of " dont worry just keep trying hard." Instead she replied by saying " Well I never reallly saw you becoming a doctor anyway, I dont think it meant for you, try something else."

I love her motivating motherly words of wisdom...

Sunday, August 2, 2009

just call me grannie panties, Hello,Roaring 20's

I'm 20 today!!

I should be estastic right?But, Im not.

Not being a teen anymore isn't something I'm happy about. My first actual adult year and I'm not exactly sure how to handle it or what to think of it. I was a teen for 6 years 13-19 and it was the best years of my life, new experiences and first year of high school first day of college ,senior year, hanging out with your crew after school, senior prom, first crushes and everything all teen years. Twenties is all about getting the career, the internship and getting your shit together. Finding the major thats going to lead you to the 7 figure career.(Im not settling for 6 figures sorry). Finding a bf, who can be a fiance (more mid-late 20's) , but still all of the pressure of the Roaring 20's. And Im feeling really old. I know soo many teens and the fact that I'm not one anymore makes me feel matronly.

I am however very glad and fortunate that I was able to live for 20 years, two whole decades, well here is for another 20 more and 20 more and 20 more and 20 more after that!!!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009


R.I.P. Hope Antz

Even though I haven't seen you in sometime now and even though I didn't know you real well, But I knew you enough.You were always happy with a smile on your face. You will be missed.

R.I.P Hope.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Simple, sweet and hushed

Its been a while since I heard good music and I'm totally obsessed right n ow with this new band callled First Aid Kit . Two twin sister I believe from Sweden, both at the very humble age of 18 and 15 I believe dont quote me :) Btw, the guitar skills are quite amazing, maybe if I practce more I can hope to be this good and the vocals are melodic and simple. Tegan and Sara eat you heart out.

This is a cover from Indie-Folk band Fleet Foxes which was my first time hearing them, as I was Youtube searching some Fleet Foxes music and I came across them.Breathtaking.

This is their original song "Our Own Pretty Ways" which is pretty amazing as well. Bok Choy and Enjoy.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

look at me

bok choy and enjoy

Friday, July 24, 2009

not much chance for survival

La Blogotheque allows musicians to perform in the most pure and raw form. From confined spaces to the streets of Paris to elevators to bathrooms

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

my conversation with city lights

I took this a couple of months ago, I posted another pic similar like this one it was taken on the same day. The sky was breathtaking, it begged for my attention. And look closely, you might even be able to see 3 white dots, the city lights that are adored by tourist have now been minimized to 3 white dots meaning absolutely nothing.


Friday, July 17, 2009


its times like this that really validates the future I want in life
nice home
rich ass hubby
fast cars

i already did the working class life
its time for the rich one

Monday, July 13, 2009

I wanna trade eyes with you, for just one moment...

So I've been gone for quite some time. I sank deep down into the abyss of the Upper East Side. Well anywhoozer im back!!
My days have been spent either at work or NYC Prep :)
Now to go off track for a bit im in major need of an outter body experience, a fkn sap. I wanna be in on the joke, I wanna see what everyone else is seeing.

Friday, July 3, 2009

NYC Prep

( From the left: Kelli, Sebastian, Camille,PC,Jessi and Taylor)

ok I am totez in love with NYC Prep on Bravo! It is a new reality show about 5 Upper East Side rich kids who go to the top prep schools in The upper east/west side. My favorite is PC a senior who is never afraid to speak his mind . I also like Kelli,Camille and Taylor. Jessie is ok so is Sebastian. He thinks he is a player and he like to hookup with multiple girls a night( "hooking up" for him is kissing a making out) at the end of the day he still is a kid who really doesnt know what he is talking about. He makes it appear as if he is having sex with 5-6 girls a night ,but I doubt it.Taylor is a sweetie she lives on the Upper West Side but she doesnt go to a prep school. She attends a very competitive publice high school whic is very hard tlo get into. The reason I connect with this show more than Laguna Beach, The Hills or any rich and young show is because NYC Prep is about who live in the same vicinty as my school. I go to school in the Uppeer East Side and I see this life everyday. I go to the Food Emporuium and I see all of these Park Avenue Princess types. Therefore this show is kinda more"real" to me and I can appreciate it more.

Any way I'm abso OBSESSED with this show ,you can say I'm in love. Im so jealous of them, I would LOVE to have this life.Being able to buy your way into and Ivy school, going top exclusive parties dressed in the latest Chanel meeting celebs going to hot clubs no need for i.d. and having a personal driver. FABURIFFIC!!

Monday, June 29, 2009

quick sand

I'm too tired.
Ever felt like moving and doing something, but your mind isn't letting you. I been through this battle too many times and Im simply tired of it all.
I know we all been there. I just gotta remember this is natural,this is natural,this is natural, this is...

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

change of plans

Ima marry rich. One day as i stroll along the Upper East Side on my way to class, I'ma run into one of the cast members from NYC Prep and its gonna be all set from there. I will drop outta college and instead of going to class, I'll go to Bergdorf's. Instead of shitty vendor food or caferteria shit, I wil be devouring the best foods of 4 star restaurants. Drive?Suway?Bus/ NAHH! I will have a personal driver to push the whip for me. Life would be grand. I would no longer be in a situation of I wanna be an artist but premed is a secure option. Money would be out the question I would'nt need to major in something to have a secure future, I can do what I want whenever I want.


But, the inner feminist in me won't allow myself to act like that. We're from opposite worlds anyway. I want love and drunken eyes. I want to have the balls if you will, to be the one to ask for the prenup NOT the guy. I want to pay for the dates to feel independent and even emasculate him, but that would be unintenional but yea its a perk of it all. And if he ever cheated on me I want to be able to not have to worry abt finances and how Ima survive without him


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

sitting on the stepping stone


or that is what they say.

But,for me, nah I never listen. If I was to devote myself to this theory completly I would not be where I am today.I would've been happier. For I would've took a plunge into an aqueous solution, one that I was unsure of, but one that I truly did love, or was madly infatuated with.
But.since I didnt follow that, I'm in a mud hole. An intersection. Divided into three paths. There's no good path and bad path,right or wrong,fun or boring. But, there is logic and just plain stipid. First love or my second one. Passion or security. Pleasure or Pain. Lace or Leather.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

the scapel,the story, or the paintbrush?

I need a breather. To figure it out.life goals etc . The scapel,the story or the paintbrush?

Monday, June 8, 2009

double post in one day

There are times when all I want is a white coat then there are times when I wanna splatter it with acrylic and oil paints. What is there to do? I want the easel and the scapel.

moving along

so far so good.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

La Blogotheque- Grizzly Bear

is so beautiful that its hauunting. Cant stop listening to the song on my zune/watching the video on youtube. All of their shows soldout so I missed out on my chance to see them play in Williamsburg last week. :(

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

epic fail

All we need as humans I believe is an epic fail. No, failing your road test doesnt count. By this I mean to fail at something that you invested so much time in. Something that you probably wouldve done for the rest of your life or perhaps someone that wouldve been in your life forever, but things didnt work out. The epic fail allows us to move on to become fearless individuals. Besides after losing something/someone that meant so much to you, you later become immune to any form of hurt. You lost what meant the most to you so as so you establish this "Fuck you pay me" attitude towards life. If you pass a class you pass it if you dont you dont. If things dont work out with your new siginifcant other, oh well I felt this before shit happens I can move on, I been through this before, Im still alive still strong. Once you hit "rock bottom" or lost a dream that meant the world to you, sooner or later you will just not care as much,this epic fail which at the time probably felt severe and terminal, can actually be a blessing. I experienced the epic fail. At first I was crushed which is natural and kept my wall up which is still there sad to say. But as time passes I became more relaxed and enjoyed life for what it is no expectations no nothing. And the outcome was fantastic . Everything went according to "plan" because you know why there was no plan,therefore no expections=no lost.
basically once you have reached the epic fail in your life,and you realize that somethings are meant to happen is when you finally get to enjoy things for what they are,which is just wondeful
So epic fail this is to you

Friday, May 29, 2009

Melodies in my head

Summer Vacation has lead me to take photographs .Im going to try to blog atleast everyday ,which I prob will do because there isnt much going on nowadays anyway, besides listen to Beirut which always leads to me getting mad I missed their show in Williamsburg,Brooklyn :( and my chance to probably meet Zach Condon.*sigh.* I also cant stop listening to "Two Weeks" Boldby Grizzly Bear.So yea the summer so far is the summer of music and photos.


Thursday, May 28, 2009

overview: place unknown

im not exactly sure where I took this photograph,but there was just someething about the sky that evening


Sunday, May 24, 2009

the fortune you seek

I'm eating Friendly's watermelon shebert that I bought from my job on sale 2 for 5 ice cream. My body is covered in my old blanket I had for years and my bed is overdosed with teddy:bears,rabbits,monkey,tigers and oh yes Garfield and Ernie from Sesame street. My mom has no problem with all of these men sleeping in my bed. Excuse me the bear is a girl. In my room I hear the roar of the fan making its prescence be known,it is loud but silent. Theres AC everywhere in my house except for my room. I get the decade old fan (exxgeration) I have to study over the summer break. To prepare myself for Fall semester's premed maddness. Sara Bareilles's song Vegas is stuck in my head and the lines "But I'd hate to lose you to the fortune you seek." is on repeat in my mind.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

heart left, naive right

Im pretty sure im done-zo with premed
let me give u the pros and cons:


  • I get to take classes like bio and learn about the human body.
  • A new sense of intelligence, knowing I'm learning concepts, alot of people wont be able to understand.
  • If I get accepted in medical school I will make my mom very happy.
  • I get to help others in need.
  • And after a while I get to make shitload of $$$$$
  • .........


  • Sleep deprivation, nahh this shit kicks in BEFORE med school.
  • Science is harddd, likee reallly hard, especially at my college , we have a reputation for hard sciences :(
  • Science is pretty boringggg,not sure if im even good at at.
  • The people are wayy too comepetive for me, I understand competiton is in every career, but asking ppl for you for your grades before they even say hi, is just douchee.
  • Too stressful, spent alot on my time crying, simply depressed. Is premed worth my happiness?
  • I can be doing this shit and not even get in med school. Can be going through this shit JUST to get rejected.
  • I have soo many passions in my life, art,theatre,photography,media,journalism, writning, fashion. Do I really wannna give that up for good.?
  • Premed makes me bitter and mean to the people I love. I become a different person I dont like that girl I become when I do premed.
  • If I get in med schoool , Im sure its gonna be boring besides the clinicals.
  • Ima be in debt like $200,000 in debt
  • Sure doctors make moneyyy but I would havee soo many loans I wont even get to enjoy it.
  • Most of the money I do make is going to go into lawsuits from patients. Doctors get sued o.d.
  • Ima have to fight for a residency, prob dont even get the one I want or be in the state I wanna be in. I wanna stay in New York.
  • Sleep deprivation is evn worse but unlike in undergrad where I can sleep whenever I want. If im on call I cant just hit the snooze buttton.
  • Family life pshh I wont have time for that shit.
  • Also sometimes I think being a doctor is kinda boring. paperwork blahhh getting bitched by my attending.
  • To be honest im not sure if I even like it

So as you can see the cons out weigh the pros. However I can't give up this idea of becoming a doctor.


Because I know if I fully pursue any of the other careers my job/future wont be stable or a definite. Pre med Im sure I will have a job and make money to support myself, un like in art, or even journalism where most of the shit is freelanced. Sometimes I hate art because I love something that isnt stable if my passion was science or business everything would be great. I can be a CEO ,scientist ,doctor or whatever and I wouldnt mind doing it and going through the harsh classes because I love it, but I dont. People always say if you can see yourself doing anything else beside being a doctor, then dont be a doctor. Hmmm food for thought.

what I would do for peace of mind...

Sunday, May 17, 2009

this is my winter song to you...

below is the official video link copy n paste it for some reason its not allowed to be embedded the official videoo is amazing so i recommend it.


Saturday, May 16, 2009

after almost two years in college i just realized i've been doing it wrong it all just wrong...wrong in every way...now it makes since

realization, how do you do?

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Beyond busy
schoool is a total educational fuck
finalss are approaching
im rethinking my major
not excited for he class i registered for fall 09 semester
my laptop is being a complete electronic fuckk soo ima stop here

Saturday, May 2, 2009


so here is my art. I dont like to use the word art to describe what I do. Im just doing ssomething that I enjoy, an expression.

Im thinking about making an Etsy account to sell some of my work hmmm...

Monday, April 27, 2009

coming attractions

updates of art work past and present coming soon. naked ppl, a portrait of kurt vonnegut, and more.
pictures of advertisments for my blog, painthecolor.blogspot.com and justine's.blogspot.com in multiplesss, eeyore with a cloud over his head,art gallery-ness
&&&&&& more
coming soon

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

just one quickie please??

Before I emerge my self in a realm of acrylic paints and synthetic yet expensive paintbrushes to do a still life that I was suppose to do over the sping break. I yet find myself doing it the night before, as usual.
things dont change, and sometime people dont either, maybe just their habits...
A s I took the subway back home from school today I realized how we all become some sort of exotic dancer once we touch the over germed and booger stained pole of a careless nose picker. We sway our bodies left to right with each bump and wobble the subway car makes, sometimes we hold the pole with one hand, grasping tight swirling our bodies aroundd the pole, and on some rare occasions we even fall down on the gentlemen sitting down, the body of a passenger in his lap, looking down at her/him wanting to touch but its forbidden, so he just stares and laughs it off. "my own personal lapdance" he thinks, and this time his wife cant bitch about it, hey it was an "accident. Then we laughs it off saying "excuse me HAHA I'm soo sorry,thats embarassing!' Just like the newcomer we are. But after awhile falling on more people on different days and months its not as emabrassing, its commonplace. We look at the passengers reddend face and move on, and think " Fucking douche bag, even didnt think to tip me."

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Brooklyn We go Hard

this videoo is soo funny like l.o.b to the 5601021 power. listen to the blonde chickk fkn stupid responsesss i believe this is a parody of modern bkyln ,but what evs my fav quotes from this is
"idk abt bkyn but I know i go hard everytime the salvation army has a sale."
"i bought this arab money scarf with my american dollers."
and " i know i go hard, thats why sometome I wish my pants werent soo tight.'

Friday, April 17, 2009

Brooklyn Beauties

Killa J
The art of Willy-B
The L train

OnlyIn Williamsburg can you find art on the sidewalk made out of gum.

yesterday was amazing i was delighted to go to woodside/sunnyside.Justine thought that was silly of me. lol butt it was amazing stray vintage was great. finally go to see what all the talk was about. i bouught an I heart queens tote bag and an Sunnsyside tee with an owl on ittt.Im too lazy to post picss so fk it So then me justine and lolo went to williamsburg went to beacons's closet and it was kind of a letdown pretty much overrated. i didnt fina anything that i mite evn be interested in hmph. Stray vintagee was soo much betta.
Willamsburg was soo muchhhh funnnn i loveeed it. hmmm can i say loft anyone. hint hint justine and lolo :)

Sunday, April 12, 2009

now listen up

so recently i have been finding myself listening to Lelia Broussard on youtubee like ayyeedayy

she's amazingggggggggg.we need more singers like this on the radio fuh real fuh real.So i decided to post a bunch of my fav vid soo u ppl can listen.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009


Sammy's made a wonderful ink drawing.I think he made the face in his head,not by looking at someoneeee or a magazine.completly random I belive, but its beautiful.^
Steven's bleeding eye and in the back is Leiya's work^
My two abstract pieces. Im going to contine using this medium.I used a necklace to "paint" with.It gave me alot of freedom with my strokes.I like that.^

My work again.just taken in black and white.^

Claudia did an amazing job.I love her strokes and the power in all 4 of her pieces.quite lovely.^

Steven's eye.I think he made this one too.I'm not sure. ^

My ink art.the big one is abstract,the smaller one is a body.other is also abstract .^

I have been slacakin on my blogger duties and shame on me!!!
today starts the first day of SPRING BREAKKK!!!! woohooo, but all of my proff's decided to
give me hw oBoldver the breakk.these ppl just keep fkn with me I tell ya.

Today by far was one of my most favorite days in my sculpture class. My favorite section of my art class was the painting ,but today in sculpture we made a pseudo ink out of acrylic paint. All you have to do is add H2O to the paint then VOILA!! Later in class Justine decided to slap me with her long ass hair while we were critiquing lol, I did start the fight bc i slapped her with my long ass scarf ,but oh well.The proff found out and she joked about it lmaoo.After art class today justine (cheapwineandfilm.blogspot.com) and andrew decided to go on the rooftop and have a photoshoot.


im suprise we didnt get caught. im not exactly sure if students are allowerd up there but it was amazing, and oh my gosh what a view of the city. after the "photoshoot" justine decided to take more pics in the art room where she exploited me and my scare of heights.BETCH.


I'm blogspot illeterate and I would like to post the ink pics right by the paragraph that talks abt them ,but i can't add pics in the middle then continue writing,well I dont know how anyway so ima just post them anywhere.deal with it.hehe.I gave credit to all of my fellow art students so no one try to start shit lol.ooohh
and justine and lolo don't get mad or offended at me bc I didn post the your pics her.I didnt have time to photgraph them all, but i think they were lovely though. :-)

Monday, March 23, 2009

Im just in a straw in the ocean

The lights go onThe lights go off
When things don't feel rightI lie down like a tired dog
Licking his wounds in the shade
When I feel aliveI try to imagine a careless life
A scenic world where the sunsets are all
A Scenic World by Beirut

Friday, March 20, 2009


RECENT ADVENTENTURES: I have found myself recently to be amazingly inspired by the resrtrictions we have as New Yorkers. NO TRESSPASSING,DONT WALK. NO (Random subway line) NOT RUNNING TODAY. My inspired mind has led me to photograph them and display them on my blog.Granted, most real new yorkers dont follow these rules.Anyway here is RESTRICT:NEW YORK

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Low Budgets

What an amazing jam session i had with justine (cheapwineandfilm.blogspot.com) and andreww today. We turned an uptown pizzeria into a art documentary and band rehearsal. The name of the band"Low Budget" it was orignally The Low Budget but i like Low Budget better its simpler and nicer paints a quite a picture.
anywhoozer i have lots of pics and vids to post i will but im tired so u my friend will have to wait.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

my eyes will burn your head will turm

studying.cramming.media midterm on mondayyy not lookin foward. have work tomorr ;( no buena mmhmm
i hate the fact that im writing this blog while i SHOULD be studying and when i get my grade back ima try to curse the world..when it is my fault if i fail..bc i decieded to blog.
my eyes are burning
your head is turning
and tuning in and out
do this and repeat
lover's will never meet
flicker the lights....

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

this is how a head aches

i got home around 7.30 is didnt study AT ALL it is now 12:10 and there is nuthin accomlpished my head is poundingggg. today in creative writing memoir got shredded by "constructive criticsim" hmmm i suppsodly did too much telling not enuff showingg.
well that was pleasant to experie nce each student goes around and give comments on how good/bad it is makes me feel valubale
i need ur opinions i really wanna transfer to NYU it was my dream school since high school, but i was too cowardly to apply. howver im at CUNY Hunter school dat was ranked number 8 by proceton reivew for best value public colleges so it is a good school and it has a good reppp bblah blahhh and its also wayy cheaper than nyu alot cheaper since it is a public universityyy
sooo idk should i go to a school cant afford therfore will open up shitload of loanss and will be in soo much debt annd grad school will add on to dat espeically since i wanna go to med school which is expensiveee hmm so its like dream school and be in debt....or just nreg good school and save money??? trust me its not as obvious as it may seem...

Monday, March 2, 2009

when the weather outside is frightful....

snow.white.cold.brr.macoroni salad. all the things thta occupy this day. school is NOT closed..wtfff Hunter college should realize that as a COMMUTERR school despite if it is in mahattan not that more than half of the student body commutes therefore shouldnt school be cancelled...idiots... not like ppl dorm anyway unless they are in a sport or in honors college and i noticed they give dorms to ppl who lIVE IN NYCC cant they commute...i live on long island and have no doItalicrm..idiotss. repeattt....
hope they see this blog to understand how mad me and the rest of the student body is about this .lamerzzz d00d

Thursday, February 26, 2009

loose lips steady hips

It has been awhile so let me catch you up. School has beeen a pain like always but its a good pain im enjoying . im soo happy im back into art i feel like a ripe fruit. im meet amazingg ppl there to especially killa J hehehe hehe (up yours) shes soo funny and intelligent nice to meet someone as awkward as me . makes it seem more commonplace. life is being nice to me a good friend for the most part. i excluded all the negatives out of my life and all.
im also enjoying the crisp linen scent of the air. The crispness is very seductive and quite pleasant.so my plans so far is to write m fairy tale rough draft,study for my upcoming media midterm,do my weekly art assignments and my weekly creative writing one page writing assigmnent. As for schoolwork i am more full than an contestant at a hotog eating contest.

Sunday, February 22, 2009


I have aquired the tasty infection of pink eye. Fkn NYC public trasnprtation is the epicenter for germs.I srsly think we should run the bio labs there in stead of in school. I woke up to see this olive colored creen goo on my eye. i felt unatractivve and more disguistin than nrmal.My throat began and still is swellin up. the sofest thing is a task for me to swollow. i feel mucus deep inside of me anxious to be released.the pink eye is gone but my throat however is killling me.AnywhoozerzI cant belive all i lost during the semester and before the semester. i feel as if im a new born baby gettin a fresh new start. its kinda refereshing to start over again yet its kinda tuff to realize what u lost but when i think abt it i didnt lose much besides drama . my trust issue is going to be the reasion to why i willl end up alone and miserble. no one can be trusted i love my mom LOVEEE HERR but even with her i still feel like there is some trust missing the whole forgive and forget thing doesnt mean shit to mee i dont forgive and hell fkn no do i forget ooh hell noooo but for my new friends i am completly grateful. My new art class reminded me on what ive been missing, to meet ppl who arent so judgemental abt grades and arent so fkn competitive. granted some of the kids can be pretentious but pretension is allowed in art. unlike in premed when there is no such thiing as talent..it doesnt take any talent to open up a textbooo until you forced yourself to attain all of the tedious fomulas they have to offer in art however .. you just kinda know If you have a "talent" per se u can see it ppl can see it.you cant see intelligence and there is no proof that u are as smart as u think u are .in art ppl can see your talent so therefore pretention in the art world is more allowed.but all things in moderation...

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

out with the old

I now realize that its time for me to let go of alot of things and even some people.its a new year and i should startt fresh. myt desire to punch the neareast wall has yet to subside,so instead i try to keep my fingers occupied because if not i will lose my minbd,which is already practically gone.since this is my frist post ima keep it light n fluffy besides there is a bunch of homeowrk with my name on it